#lenting

i feel guilt
maybe its because i spent more than i should be spending
in the past 3 days
maybe its because ive been planning nonstop
for every meal
to make sure these next few weeks are a breeze
and cost effective
but from my reading this morning
im convicted that this isnt the point
im convinced that this isnt the goal
it's to look to You, isnt it?
to do Your work
to be Your hands and feet----
isnt it?

but ive been really focused on me
how i can make this time bearable
how i can plan to make things go smoothly
how these things can benefit my health
and justifying my distraction
over and over again..

well, Father
today...my response:
----i turn to You.
i'm sorry for taking things
and making this time about me
i don't know the steps
to make them not about me
so, i turn to You
and ask that you lead the way..
give me Your heart
Your dreams
show me how to do things
Your way..