intentions..

P.Matt has been giving quite a view sermons on the condition of our hearts.
i guess now is a good time...as good as any other to ask..whats the condition of mine?
what are my intentions?
are the pure?....are they glorifying God?

honestly.. i don't know anymore..

i feel as though i don't understand enough..or am connected enough to be certain at all times that my actions are pure in intention..
instead of feeling as though im walking on pins and needles..i want..need a pure heart to be somewhat natural...to be apart of me..
i guess that this would have to start with a renewing of my heart no?

i can say this all day and all night..but the question is do i really want this?
do i really want my pride to broken down? am i willing to have myself disappear behind the Cross? am i ready to release control of my life and let God have His way?

i have alot to think and pray about..
join with me eh?

kisses for youuu [muahz!]
tomisaurus

babynames

so lately, i've been thinking
about kid names and future family?

ideal:
3 kids...1 boy..twin girls

heyhey...dont give me that face
it could happen :]

Aidan, Madeline and Melody
or
Nolan, Amelia and Aida
or...
ok im getting ahead of myself..

oh happy day!
weekend with Donna Donna Dooonnaa
:] that's my excited face :]
okbyyye

kisses for you.. [muahhz]
roger's here too..he sends kisses as well
-tomisaurus

shiest..

i don't want to think...no...no thinking..
it hurts..yea it hurts..
what's it like to have a happy family?
oi..
i want to leave..

sometimes i feel like...goshdarnit
just get it over with..freaking separate
but to pretend like it doesnt exist
keeping up appearances..

makes everything seem like a lie.

taking a minute..

to count my blessings
the ones that i overlooked in my glum glum merr

1. im getting all the rest i could ever get
2. im getting paid to tutor the kid for $100+ a week
3. im sorta getting allowance every two weeks..

so today after prayer i read Ephesians 3..
its amazing how i had some burning questions about God's plan for us...
were the Israelites the only ones that were to recieve God's grace?
was not ALL of the world to be saved?

i thank God for His mercy...
so get this.. His plan from the beginning was to save the WHOLE world..the entire thing..
with His son Jesus..
it was revealed from the beginning..right after the orig sin..
how could i forget that..
how could i ever doubt His judgement..His timing..
gosh we are so forgetful so fast arent we...
i thank Him for His grace and patience

and so jooooy returns and blossoms :]

[love like a hurricane, i am the tree...bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy]

:]
kisses for youu [muaaahz!]
-tomisaurus

so i had the weirdest dream..
i was kissing on some Asian guy...[bahahaha go figure]
i couldnt make out his face though
...that always seems to happen.....

anyways..
that Eric guy with the HUGE arms was making fun of us..
um...i dont even speak to that Eric kid..
WHY was he in my dream?
weird..

i digress
-tomisaurus

seeking

this morning i woke up with a sense of...unhappiness
..doubtfulness and uncertainty...
what if this God that i yearn to know, love and trust...doesnt exist?
what if this amazing Love that i've come to adore is just....a fantasy?
:/ ..what if we're wrong....

i thank God for His Grace...
even in my doubt and uncertainty, He loves me and wants to help and encourage me..
i thank God for His understanding and his Love...
He knows that all i needed was to be reminded of His awesomeness in my life and in the lives of others.
i give Him all the praise..
just to be in His presence in joy :]

kisses for youu [muahzz!]
-tomisaurus

daydream

im a dreamer..
that's supposed to be a good thing right?
the thing about being a dreamer is that action might not be pushed behind those dreams..
so the dreams are left as little bubbles in the sky...
....we're not sure what happens to those...
i feel like my dreams are starting to take that form..

Summer goal #4 : become an action-er

summer is sucking thus far..
Apple is sick...and at the doctor's
i misses her :[

i need a job..
[Summer Goal #1 :get moneys]

because Apple is sick...i cant go annnnyyywhhherrree
today, i slept until 1
GAH. unacceptableee
sooo..ive decided on a workout plan:
8:30-up and devotion
9:00-stretching
9:15- err...we'll see?
[Summer Goal #2: get in shape]

Bahaha i smell an epic faaiiilll
no..NO..
BAHAHA..we'll see

ya know...i miss my worn out acid-wash skinny jeans
i must find another pair
[Summer Goal #3: acid wash skinnies]

DONNA COMES BACK THIS WEEK!!!!
chika chika YEAAA! ~_^

well i should sleep no?
kisses for youu [muahz!]
-tomisaurus

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
B+???
SERIOUSLY???
rawr.
this has to be a mistake
a terrible TERRIBLE mistake

hairr

india arie said...'i am not my hair'

hm...well i am [meh thinkss]
my hair is curly..sorta wild and incredibly unpredictable..
it surprises me alot.
its versatile but can be a tad resistant to change..
it loves...to be loved

i'm not really curly
but the rest is mostly true
i think?
eh..

self-discovery
i guess it comes with age
with experience..
my journey has begun, i suppose, but not without difficulties..

:]
summer has begun..
the retreat was AMAZINGGG
God moved in such a powerful way
left with alot to think and pray about..

i'm getting lazy...oi :/
i'll talk more about that later..

kisses :]
tomisaurus