oh guard this fickle...weak heart of mine.

...every time i remember
...i want to slam my face against a wall..

haha
that sounds alot more serious here than it did in my head..

flight.

is it weird that this song makes me feel like a superhero?

well maybe not the whole song, but moreso the chorus...
in the moments when i feel the most immobile..
its awesome to remember that the movers and shakers of this world are nothing short of regular people who did something.

idk..there's hope in that.
hope in knowing that we're called to be more than onlookers
more than just watching the rest touch the stars and rock this world..
even moreso in Faith we're called to go out there and put His love in action..
and what do you know His love...changes the world.
there's gotta be a reason that im this age at this moment in history..
i'll never be younger. and my next moment's not promised.

"tonight, we are young. so let's set this world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun."

i remember reading on someone's profile or in one of their pictures or during one of my tumblr stalking journeys a quote by Francis Chan, that i hold to be truth : "Do you know that nothing you do in this life will ever matter, unless its about loving God and loving the people He has made..."

haha i remember saying that instead of wanting to be a dreamer, i wanted to be an actioner.

sounds corny, but:
 it. is. time.

seems as though..

i have 3 choices in this situation:

get upset and angry that things aren't going my way. blaming all else for my misfortune.
be depressed that it keeps coming back to haunt me. blaming myself into a dark, dark hole.
or, pray, accept and let go, trust. accepting responsibility but moving forward in hope and with Faith.

sigh. Matt 6:27
oh life, what a dance...what a dance

crumbling start

sometimes i feel alone..
in a house full of people i feel alone
and trapped.

then sometimes..
i feel as though my support system is unshakable
i feel so secure and loved.

i realized that i have no idea what im doing
i don't know how to do life
at service, during worship..
i wished i could just crumble to the floor in His presence
and feel Him pick me back up again..
and show me how to change..
because ive come to a point
where i know...that i don't know

i feel so small.