i have decided to follow Jesus,
i have decided to follow Jesus,
i have decided to follow Jesus,
no turning back, no turning back.

my heart began to slow the moment i saw it..
and then i knew..
i'm deeper than i originally thought..

but then again...i knew..
and it's ok...
but is it?
i feel that it is..
shrug..

this place... this moment,
is good.

all along..
we're basically the same person..
except............

its detrimental..
the way i talk about this..
in my head,
in my heart..

Father, i can't see it..
they say it..
but i don't believe it..
...can't believe it..

can You help with this too?

but really though....
the tendencies,
reactions,
and actions of people..
of humans
are a blimey mystery.

sometimes i feel it futile to even try to understand..
to speculate and conclude..
to guess..
it all feels so bloody...useless.

yea, there are patterns...sort of..
...but we aren't equations.


as frustrating as it all feels..
its kind of ....exciting..

so. many. feels.

ugh.
man i hate the feels.
time to fight.

...but already?
reaaallyyyy?
now?

sigh.
can't i just bask?

what do You say about me?